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I never intended to ignore my little blog for six months but you know what it’s like, one minute you are still wearing sandals and buying boxes of double chocolate Cornettos at Sainsburys, and then in what seems like a wink of an eye, you’re eating Hot Cross Buns and hoping that an application of feed and weed will restore the lawn back to its pre-winter glory.

Time just has this annoying habit of flying, even when every day at present seems to roll into each other and going out somewhere special means dressing up for a trip to Waitrose instead of Aldi and applying lipstick which is a bit pointless because nobody is actually going to see your lips. Lipstick sales must have hit rock bottom since we went into Lockdown One last year. I tell you now, once we have been liberated from the need to wear face coverings, I’m going to wear the bright red lipstick all day every day, even though I know that it looks awful on me. Forget Red Nose Day, let’s have Red Lips Day!

Red lipstick smile!

So, why the blogging silence? I have no excuses. I just didn’t really have anything worth saying, which is quite sad really. There have been days when I’ve had wobbles because of my insecurities and paranoia and that’s been hard to cope with at times. I have felt invisible, insecure and not in control.Self doubt came by in the bucket loads. The current global pandemic hasn’t helped, and I imagine that I’m not the only one who finds this a bloody difficult time emotionally. I am feeling more like the ‘old’ me lately and that’s because I took the decision to improve my health and wellbeing. Eating too much sugar and stodge was not only piling on more pounds to an already very heavy body, but it was making me feel sluggish, uncomfortable and affecting my confidence. I wasn’t sleeping well and just wasn’t liking myself.

Not me, but this is how I see myself as.

I needed to take control and start looking after me!

I didn’t want a quick fix diet. We know they don’t work. I’m not knocking the likes of Slimming World or Weight Watchers. I know that for many they have helped people to lose weight, but I wanted a plan that is all about developing healthy habits including diet, exercise, sleep and general wellbeing. In January I signed up to Nuush ran by the very lovely Sally Pinnagar and two months later I am definitely feeling the benefits of eating a Mediterranean based diet. The meal plans are jammed packed with delicious recipes. The emphesis is on eating lots of plant based foods and swapping the likes of processed carbohydrates for wholefood equivilents, so out go white pasta and in come wholewheat. White rice has been swapped for wholegrain. I still eat pizza, chips cheese and chocolate, but in moderation. There is no calorie counting or points system and low fat versions of anything is to be avoided. I can’t begin to tell you how many cartons of delicious full fat Greek yogurt I’ve got through in ten weeks! I’ve started walking more and there’s now a bounce in my step. I follow the plan to the letter and I must be doing it right as I not only feel energised, I’ve also lost 20lbs and no longer avoid looking in mirrors! Apart from the delicious food that I’m eating, I also love being part of the Nuush community and all the support that’s given by Sally and fellow Nuushies. I feel like I’m part of a big family.

A few days ago I asked a question on the brilliant Facebook group Postcards from Midlife. I wanted to know if I, at 61, was still classed as midlife or am I now veering towards ‘old’? In years gone by, being 60 and with a pension would be classed as old. You were an OAP. The answer was a resounding yes to being midlife and no to being old. I know that age is just a number and as the saying goes, you are as old as you feel, but it does bother me that I’ve maybe missed the boat as far as work and career goes. There are times when I wish that I had continued my nursing career and specialised in an area. I think that I would have liked to have become a practice nurse. The hospitality business is something that has always appealed to me but dreams of owning a B&B will have to remain a dream and so will owning a deli or teashop because for a start the money isn’t there to finance such ventures and you need a lot of stamina which at 61 could be an issue.

As much as I enjoy my current job as a teaching assistant, I feel that it’s unfair to ask five year olds to help their TA when she can’t get out of a diddy little chair! I still feel like I have lots to offer, but doing what, I haven’t the foggiest!

Do you remember that I wrote a book? Well, to be correct, the first draft of one. After a few months off, I started on the edits. Being a complete novice, I felt that I needed some professional help so I turned to a favourite author of mine, the gifted and lovely Emma Cooper who also offers a manuscript appraisal service. She has been such a huge help in advising how I can make improvements and what tweeks need making. She was also really encouraging and it lifted me no end to hear that she really enjoyed what I’d written and that I could actually write! So, it’s full steam ahead now and I’m really excited to get the book finished and hopefully published. Do read Emma’s books. They are just wonderful.

So, when life hopefully returns to normal, what is on this year’s to do/achieve wish list?

Stop procrastinating and start doing!

Have lots of meals with family and friends, especially Sunday lunches.

Swim in the sea

Finish the book and hopefully find an agent

Go on more solo trip to Penzance. Hopefully including another fab workshop with Sarah Bell watercolourworkshopcornwall

Visit the Isles of Scilly

Walk lots more

Meet the people who I have connected with on social media

Bake more

Go on a retreat

Have a facial/spa treatment

Buy new clothes in a smaller size

Embrace oppurtunities, challenges, adventures

Blog!

Wear red lipstick

It’s really great to be blogging again. If you find a few minutes to read my ramblings, you’ll make my one fingered typing worthwhile and me a happy little blogger!