February 2023.

Me to Mr R “Fancy going on a cruise this summer?”

Response “Can’t think of anything worse.”

March 2023

Me to Mr R (same question repeated on a regular basis) “Fancy going on a really lovely ship to Norway this summer?”

Response “Will you please stop going on about a cruise.”

April 2023

Me to Mr R ( probably once a day ) ” Fancy watching this Youtube video of the really lovely ship and this Youtube video of the fjords?”

Response (eventually) “Just book the damn cruise!”

So before he had the chance to change his mind, I booked a week on Cunard’s Queen Mary 2 going to the Norwegian fjords at the end of August.

August 2023

Mr R to me ” I’m still not sure that I will go.”

My response? Actually, I can’t repeat it here, but lets just say that I wasn’t polite and if I’d had a heavy blunt instrument handy, I might have been tempted to use it !

At the last minute, Mr R was persuaded to go once he’d checked the long range shipping forecast and discovered that no force 10 gales were predicted in the North Sea and had finally watched a Youtube ship tour of our ocean going liner and was pleasantly surprised that it wasn’t a glorified cross channel ferry and there were more lifeboats on board than on the Titanic. He also discovered that room service was included and he could stay in the cabin for the duration if he wanted to and not have to mingle with anyone.

August 25th 2023

We had stayed in Southampton overnight at The fabulous Harbour Hotel as an extra special way to start our holiday and to avoid the added stress of possible traffic jams or car trouble if we left travelling to the port on the day of embarkation. Early that morning, as the sun was rising, we watched a procession of cruise ships returning from their travels glide silently past our hotel window. The last ship to arrive was Queen Mary 2. Mr R’s eyes lit up and I heard a “wow”. I knew then that everything would be ok.

At the cruise ship terminal we handed our car over to the car park attendant and walked across the road to where our luggage was taken from us. The next time we saw it was when we found our cabin, or should I say stateroom, because that’s what they are called on a Cunard ship. Our luggage was waiting outside our door. No lugging suitcases into lifts and along corridors when you go on a cruise.

Before entering the terminal we stopped and gazed at our home for the next week. The ship is beautiful and big. From her dark hull to her tiered aft and distinctive funnel. She is unique and impressive.

Embarkation was a doddle. You are given an embarkation time so there is no hanging around. We had already printed off our boarding passes, so it was just a matter of getting them checked, go through security and walk the zig-zag sloping walkway to the ship. One more check of our boarding passes and we were on the ship and being greeted by the iconic Cunard stewards in their scarlet uniforms, bellboy caps and white gloves. We really should have been dressed in blazer, cravat, wide turn up trouser, boater (Mr R) floppy rimmed hat, tea dress, silk stockings, Mary Jane shoes and fox fur stole (me) to look the part rather than trainers, shorts, jeans and tee-shirts. But it’s 2023 not 1933 and everyone was dressed for comfort on embarkation day rather than to be stylish.

Actually dressing up is a big thing on a Cunard ship but not during the day and not on embarkation day. It’s a different matter in the evening. More about that later.

If you don’t already know, the Queen Mary 2 is the only ocean going liner in existence. She is designed to criss-cross the Atlantic at any time of the year and in any weather. To a seasoned cruiser her layout is confusing and just doesn’t make sense. No sundeck and swimming pools at the top of the ship. Just wide open spaces. The pool and sundecks are at the aft, which is the ship term for the back. The bow being the front. Whilst talking about ship terms, you never say floor, but you say deck and you are either port or starboard and you’ll end up walking the plank if you call a ship a boat. Never, ever do that!

Once through the doors and past the welcoming party (so regretting not getting a photo taken next to one of the smiling chaps in red) you find yourself in the Grand Lobby. It’s not huge and its not glitzy or showy with crystal encrusted stairways, but it is grand and elegant and stylish with a beautiful display of fresh flowers at its centre and an art deco bas-relief of the ship itself that glistens from above. Musicians are playing in the lobby but we are too in awe to notice. We needed to find our muster station to check in and we needed to orientate ourselves in our fabulous but unfamiliar surroundings. At this point we were very glad to not have to cart around heavy suitcases. How to get to our designated muster station outside the Princess Grills dining room on deck seven from deck two? Even with deck plans dotted around the ship to help us, we still got lost. Mr R was beginning to lose patience and storming off at a pace. Me, with my short legs couldn’t keep up and we were in danger of losing sight of each other. Thank goodness for the crew who are used to confused passengers not having the foggiest idea where they are or how to get to where they want to be. Eventually we found our muster station and made our way to our stateroom, which after the hoo-ha of trying to find the muster station was actually very easy.

Confused by this muster station thingy? Well, if you go on a cruise you have to go to your muster station so you know where to go in an emergency. You also have to watch the safety drill which in times gone by meant you donned your lifejacket and everyone attended the briefing. These days, you are more likely to watch it on the television in your cabin (sorry, stateroom ). It’s a legal requirement that you go to your muster station on embarkation day. If you don’t you get thrown overboard. Okay, so that bit isn’t true but you will be searched out and made to go.

I’m going to finish here as I need to stop and ice a cake. Next time, I’ll let you know about our stateroom, sailaway, exploring the ship, dinner and what to do on a sea day.

Cunard Line